Without you

I will forget..I promise to forget everything for you.The dreams we saw together,the moments we hsared,the secrets you whispered-anything and evrything.I will let it fade from my heart..like a forgotten fairy tale-for THE HERO OF MY INCOMPLETE LOVE STORY,I will forget evrything because that's all I can do for you.You wre the light of my life and my eyes can sense only darkness since you abandoned me,what for wa it ? ? I still don't know.
Every time you hurt me,you hoped to heal with a five letter word
"S-O-R-R-Y".Yet I said nothing but forced a smile in reply hiding the piercing pain of bleeding heart.the pain only getting unbearbale,the wound stays unhealed,memories like a stain continue to chase my life.Yet my love for you is still the same.Everything around me reminds me of you-of the days when I used to scribble your name everywhere,of the moments we shared-how much I value those priceless moments ,I fail to explain to you.
I shut my eyes and I see you talking to me,I fear that I may lose and each time I try to touch you,to feel you,you seem to move farther when I step closer.Yet my broken heart continues to beat for you.Tired of crying so I try to hate you,so I may forget you-to let your charming face fade away,to let our dreams of "being together"die,to stab any thought that reminds me of you,to smile because I know I am dying deep inside.But all my attepts failed and I feel like a failure before your ETERNAL LOVE for me.I try to conside everything as a bad dream or perhaps hope someday you would come upto me only to say " baby , it was only a joke , donchu still love me? "
Wonchu come?? I will wait.Wait till you come.Wait for your return.And I have been waiting since so many lives.The lonely shores are the witness.The stealthily blowing wind knows about it.The stars are the witness..and so are the lonely shores and now that I have revealed it to you..you too know about my longing to see you again..
Many Many Happy Returns of the Day Dedicating this work to Asad Siddique
There was a time when birthdays weren't known to me, a time when the bursting of balloons,flash of camera or the singing of the birthday song in chorus made me look around with bulging eyes till my lips turned into an unpleasant curve-a pout, followed by my loud cry. That, was my first birthday. 2nd birthday should have been similar because I don't recollect anything differently either.
With time passing, I realised , the singing chorus was a happy event unlike my belief of having concluded it was a mass yelling directed at me,camera flash was nothing to fear but a mirror that showed me cutting cake and opening gifts, and bursting of balloons happened only when someone squeezed or stepped on it.
Birthdays in the later years, was a long awaited event. The idea of being the centre of attention for the day excited me heavily. However, concentrating on the cakecutting and playing games made me impatient with my eyes stealthily glancing at the growing pile of gifts and flashy wrappers.
A time approached my mindset of 'awaiting' birthdays when teen years struck me with the fantasy of its own. Pangs of desire to be frozen to eternity in the youthful phase of life pricked me as my days of buying soaps and creams promising to replenish fairness and beauty filed my drawers.
As I write this, I see myself on the threshold of adulthood, a long journey of battle ahead awaits me, wanting to see how I would face the unexpected twists and turns of life. Birthdays will then be nothing but a day to shun away from the ritual of being enquired one's age. Gradually the uninvited guest will walk into my life -Oldage.


Memory would fade, days would drag, reltaionships would be a name, living - a pain. Sooner, there will come a time when my birthday will be known to none and then I will close my eyes to eternity celebrating my....

.........................................................re-BIRTH